


Alfie Solomons Children's Birthday Headcannons

by Higgles123



Series: Peaky Blinders and Tom Hardy Character Headcannons and Alphabets [16]
Category: Peaky Blinders (TV)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:40:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27031318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Higgles123/pseuds/Higgles123
Series: Peaky Blinders and Tom Hardy Character Headcannons and Alphabets [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1971034
Kudos: 8





	Alfie Solomons Children's Birthday Headcannons

  * Everyone knows that Alfie adores his children. So it will hardly come as a surprise to anyone to hear that when it comes to their birthdays, nothing is too much for Alfie. You see, growing up he remembers birthdays where his mother couldn’t afford to get him anything. In fact one year, she had used her wooden laundry pegs and drawn faces on them to turn them into little wooden toy soldiers. It was only as he got older that realised it had broken her heart to have to explain to him that the lack of gifts wasn’t a punishment for anything he might have done, but merely it was because she had no money despite working so hard. Therefore, Alfie goes absolutely wild when it’s his children’s birthdays.



  * Preparations begin months in advance. The gifts are already carefully selected, apart from a few that will have to be picked up closer to the big day because his children can never make up their minds and he never wants to them to be disappointed. Literally, last year one of the girls let slip at bedtime the night before her birthday that she really wanted a doll with brown hair and a red dress with white lace edging and a matching bonnet because her friend at school had the same doll. Despite his wife’s protestations, Alfie marched round to the house of poor Mr Clayton, who owned the toy shop, and demanded he come and open up the shop immediately so that Alfie could get what his little girl wanted. And when he got there, the only brown haired doll in the shop had a blue dress, and well, that just would not do. So Alfie purchased the doll and then marched on down to the local seamstress’ house, where he paid the woman a rather rich sum of money to make a red dress and matching bonnet for the doll right there and then.



  * Once the children are in bed, Alfie sets to work on decorating the house with birthday banners and balloons etc. Well, his wife does the decorating while he ‘oversees’ with a look on his face that speaks of just how wrong she’s doing everything. In the end, she will tell him that he can bloody well do it himself, not realising that that’s exactly what he was hoping she would say, because the truth is that Alfie actually is a terrible control freak and everything has to be just so.



  * In the morning, Alfie is awake hours before the children, and as the minutes pass he gets more and more impatient, waiting for the thundering of little footsteps down the stairs. Usually he nods off in his armchair only to be awoken by his wife who informs him that the children are awake. _“Oh yeah, I know. I was just restin’ my eyes for minute.”_ Now it’s not just the birthday child who gets presents. Oh no, the other children get a few presents as well _“just so they don’t feel left out”_. His wife thinks this is ludicrous because they all get one birthday every year so they’ll each get a turn, but Alfie won’t be swayed and so now she’s giving up telling him. After the presents are opened, the kids are absolutely not allowed to eat anything remotely breakfast-like. Instead Alfie insists on feeding them all cake and jelly and ice cream- at seven in the morning!



  * Suitably high as kites, Alfie hates the fact that he has to take the kids to school. _“I mean, it’s a fuckin’ disgrace that kids should have to spend their birthdays away from their parents. Like, this is literally the day that they were born unto the earth and it should be a special family day.”_ But the second school finishes, he’s ready to pick them up so that they can get ready for the party that he’s planned meticulously.



  * Now once the kids are dressed in their brand new party outfits, the party can begin. Alfie prefers to have the parties at home and every party will have a different theme, depending on the child’s interest at the time. One year, his youngest daughter was obsessed with mermaids and the beach and so Alfie had a huge tank built in their very large garden. His wife thought he was absolutely mental when he explained that he had paid a lot of money to have some of them gymnasts from the circus to put on elaborately made coloured tails and swim about in the giant tank, alongside hundreds of different coloured fish he had borrowed from the pet shop. He did say he had contacted the local zoo to see if they could provide some sea lions and parrots for the occasion and it hadn’t gone down too well when they declined to do so. He had had tonnes of sand spread around the garden so that it looked like the seaside and there was a fish and chip van and an ice cream truck. He also had little fairground rides brought into the garden, candyfloss machines, coconut shies; the list was endless. At the end of the party every child was given a goldfish in a tank. At this his wife had truly gone beserk. _“What? Well I couldn’t very well give them a fish in a bag like they actually do at the fair could I? Fucking animal cruelty that is.”_



  * The parties Alfie throws for his childrens’ birthdays are absolutely ridiculous, but the truth is that the looks on his childrens’ faces are worth every bit of money and every bit of stress (because truthfully Alfie stresses about the parties for months beforehand). And reluctantly, at the end of the night when the kids are asleep and the mess is all cleaned away, even his wife has to agree that perhaps it was really rather amazing.



  * However when Alfie starts harping on about ideas for the next birthday coming up, she is quickly exasperated for loving yet slightly deranged husband.




End file.
